LOSING BATTLE
Circa WAY BACK WHEN (I was 19 years old & wet behind the ears):
So, there I was sitting all by myself, minding my own business in a college cafeteria. In the middle of enjoying my meal, a sudden pungent smell came drifting my way- cigarette smoke! I do not smoke, and I dislike the smell…Even if I attempted to move 5 feet to my left or right, the trail would have targeted me. Tracing the smoke back to its source, was a Young Lady puffing away.
With the smoke encamped at my table, there was no way of enjoying my meal. Given this, I got up and approached the Young Lady.
Standing next to her, I bent down with the hopes of keeping our conversation cordial and exclusive to us. Attempting to be as political and kind as possible, I said,” Excuse me miss. I’m sorry to bother you, but is there any way you can move your cigarette, so the smoke doesn’t go in the direction where I am eating?”
Young Lady (annoyed and defiant): “What do you want me to do?”
Me (attempting to keep things cool): “Perhaps you can just move your cigarette to the right a little?...In that way, it doesn’t drift directly into me.”
Note: But this time, the girls sitting around the Young Lady are witnessing the commotion…
Young Lady (arrogantly): “But if I do THAT, then the smoke will just go into my friends face.”
The Young Lady afterwards smirked…
Me (slightly raising my voice in self-righteous fashion): “So you’re not willing to move the cigarette to the side, even though you know its drifting right into my face?”
Young Lady (as a matter of fact): “THAT’S RIGHT.”
At that point something inside me just CLICKED, and the script FLIPPED!
Me (looking directly in her eyes): “Okay, if you won’t move it…..I WILL!”
When I said the word WILL, I SNATCHED the cigarette from her mouth, FLICKED it on the ground, and STEPPED on it to put it out.
Without hesitation and in UNISON, about 10 females sitting all around the Young Lady began jeering & heckling, “Oh, BIG MAN! MACHO MAN! Oh, he’s a TOUGH GUY, grabbing a cigarette out of a girl’s mouth! You’re a BIG MAN!...LOOK AT YOU! Wow, we’re all impressed, MACHO!”
In the meantime, the Young Lady became so empowered that she lit up another cigarette!
YIKES!.....It was like I unleashed HYDRA!...The head I just chopped- spouted into 10 more! I did not expect that reaction! A table full of fired-up females fighting for a cause…I stirred up a HORNET’S NEST & they just GAVE IT TO ME!
As the incessant heckling continued…I had no choice to immediately move my food tray to another area-ACROSS THE ROOM!
DANG!... All I could think of- ‘GET ME THE HELL OUTTA HERE!’
P.S. Man, did I learn a lesson: You can never win challenging a woman. It NEVER-EVER ends well. It gets complicated and messy….and it is just not worth it. I am not saying you cannot adeptly confront someone of the opposite sex if you need to address an issue, but when it looks like it going to escalate and go SOUTH (when you’re about to enter a VORTEX that jut sucks you FURTHER DOWN…you’ll know when that point is reached ☹)- immediately AND I MEAN, IMMEDIATELY- move on and take the HIGH ROAD, Bro. My tip- Don’t fight a LOSING BATTLE….from the Lookout Post.