LOOKING into THE ABYSS

“…And when you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will also gaze into you.”

-Nietzsche (Beyond Good and Evil)

FACT:
Every being in our vicinity and beyond, will likely physically perish in 100 years. All of us are finite beings and everyone will be forced to LOOK INTO THE ABYSS. The Abyss I speak of, is that destination of consciousness when we are at the end of this transient life. All of us will unfortunately undergo this journey of ‘Passing’ (i.e. dying, shedding of the cocoon).

TWO EXAMPLES:
I witnessed firsthand, two lessons of victory in death: My Father & Mother taught me how to die. In Passing, both detached their identities with the body and achieved freedom from the constraints and conditions, the physical world imposed upon them. They exemplified the GRACE TO NOT CLING onto that which they cherished the most (i.e. their loved ones and the life they made for themselves). Finding themselves at the bottom of a metaphysical lake & held down by an anchor which prevented them from rising to the top- they simply, ‘Let Go’. They no longer held on, and they took the ultimate control over their situation. Both LOOKED INTO THE ABYSS and defiantly spat at it. I saw my Father take the ultimate control when he literally gritted his teeth to prevent us from spoon feeding him food during Hospice. It was his way of saying, ‘Enough! Unacceptable! I don’t want to exist like this!’

I saw my Mother take the ultimate control when the ICU Trauma Surgeon forgot his bed-side manners and loudly counselled my older brother and I that we had to start making plans to place her into a Hospice facility. Hearing the very word HOSPICE incited my Mother to vehemently object. Being a Head Nurse for 35 years and taking point in the care of my Fathers final days, she was more than aware of what the Hospice process entailed. Unable to lift her limbs four hours ago and barely able to grunt; she belted out an indiscernible yell and lifted her arm four feet above her! Afterwards, just as quickly as she lifted her arm, it dropped, and she fell into a deep sleep. It was her way of saying, ‘Enough! Unacceptable! I don’t want to exist like this!’

LESSON LEARNED:
I had a front-row seat and witnessed the dynamic process of Overcoming & Letting go. Generally, we view Overcoming as prevailing over an opposing force, thought, condition, or conflict. It usually connotes imposing ones will until our desired futurity manifests. But there are circumstances where our will cannot change our present reality. How then, is Overcoming’ possible? The answer is always: By Letting Go.

LETTING GO:
What is ‘Letting Go’ if not figuratively releasing the influence something or someone has over you, it eradicates any hold it has on you. It entails giving up any desire for someone or to change something. It connotes no longer accepting the terms something or someone has over you. Letting Go is NOT giving up, giving out, or giving in. It is quite the contrary; for it involves re-directing ones will (in the face of insurmountable odds) and changing what one wants. Despite dire external circumstances, LETTING GO encompasses maintaining control OF SELF. In my parents’ situation, it entailed releasing the grip of futility this transient reality imposed upon their physical bodies.

P.S. In both instances, there was an ACT OF DEFIANCE, rebellion, and an absolute unacceptance of their physical condition. It was a clear, irrevocable, and UNAPOLOGETIC OBJECTION to the terms their physical body succumbed to. It was a REFUSAL TO CONSENT to this transient reality. In retrospect, I learned that there are times when one cannot overcome- without LETTING TO. Through their last act on earth, they taught me the transcending capacity to LET GO OF LIFE and OVERCOME DEATH. A courageous demonstration of GRACE to NOT CLING onto that WHICH WE CHERISH THE MOST! WOW!!!!! How fortunate am I to witness it? For, both, taught me- HOW TO DIE…Who can aspire to that??????  To quote my friend Raphael, “A testament to their very existence!”

B.P.S. Once we are born- the hourglass of life is turned & our grains of sand are emptied (one by one). So, when it is my turn to GAZE LONG INTO THE ABYSS- may I find that SAME FORTITUDE in me…from the Lookout Post.