SECRET SAUCE
This blog purposefully follows my previous Blog (Against All Odds) to establish chronology…
PARADOX OF DESIRE:
When wanting something so bad- causes you to CHOKE.
When trying too hard- breaks the connection (of ONENESS) with the objective.
When striving after- only blocks the MAGNET that attracts the goal.
When craving the crowning achievement- gets IN THE WAY of achieving.
When a desperate desire to win- makes you lose your NERVE.
I want to convey one of my favorite B-Ball stories, when I first really understood THE SECRET SAUCE (the anomaly impetus) to overcome the PARADOX OF DESIRE: NOT CARING!
BASKETBALL CAMP:
The true genesis of my epiphany manifested itself during the summer prior to my Junior year in High School. It materialized while I was attending the prestigious Clarion College Basketball Camp wherein many elite High School basketball athletes would come to hone their skills. The camp offered an intense 5-day dorm atmosphere which taught fundamental skills, plays, shooting, passing, dribbling and defensive drills. It was extremely arduous and HIGHLY competitive. One year prior, I begged my father for weeks to finance the trip and he eventually caved in. My first camp at Clarion College took place the summer between my 9th and 10th grade. To this day I can vividly recall a senior named Shrewsberry that everyone lauded, much like Steph Curry. He had incredible handles and could shoot literally anywhere on the court. Oh, how I longed to be ‘Like Shrewsberry’!
PRACTICE:
Having gone through the camp a year before, I took special note of every dribbling skill it had to offer. At the end of the camp, they would hold a contest amongst the more proficient ball handlers wherein everyone would gather around to observe the extravaganza. It was a big deal, and the platform was PURE ENTERTAINMENT. For a year, I rehearsed that very moment, visualizing the most minute detail. I practiced daily each drill repeatedly until it became second nature. On top of that, I mastered many of Pistol Pete Maravich’s tricks. No one was more prepared than me…NO ONE! Man, I wanted that trophy- I envisioned holding it, and I needed it! To me, winning that contest would validate me as a legitimate PLAYER. My identity became entangled with it and after failing to make the 1st String a year prior- it was IMPERATIVE!
THURSDAY:
It was the 4th day in camp and after 3:00pm, they held the FOUL SHOOTING Contest. This was the first contest to test our skills; the remainder of the contests would take place tomorrow. There were 6 baskets and all of us were divided up into 6 groups. Camp Counselors (Coaches for Clarion College and Varsity members) would call out the names of the two competitors. The contestants would meet each other at the foul line. We had 7 shots and whoever made the most, moved on to the next level (winners competing with winners). Well, my competitor was a below average athlete, and I knew this should be a slam dunk win. So, I thought…man, the second I stepped up to the Foul Line, all those months of practicing for THAT MOMENT just hit me! DANG! The pressure I put on myself just evaporated my concentration. The weight of the whole world was on my shoulders and every shot seemed like life and death. I think I made 3 out of 7 shoots and my competitor (who was HORRIBLE as well) made 3, so we had to shoot another 7! Not only was this EMBARRASSING to me, but the thought of losing to this guy was nothing short of BEING SHAMED! There I was at the Foul Line again- trembling!....TREMBLING! Without any semblance of composure, I luckily made 3 shots again! ☹ My competitor made 4! OH MY!!!! …With head down, shoulders slumped, I left the court totally deflated. It was like all my dreams were CRUSHED! I was absolutely lost, disgraced, humiliated, BEWILDERED, and defeated.
THAT NIGHT:
Emotionally exhausted, I waited until my Dad came home from work and called. He was not only my best friend, but my Mentor, and Baseball Coach since I was 6 years old. I told him about the whole contemptible affair, and then I pleaded with him to come and pick me up. Man, all I wanted to do- WAS GO HOME and lick my wounds. Dad said that Clarion College was an hour away and I only had 1 more day. He knew how hard I worked at my skills and how BAD I WANTED this. He also knew me inside and out. He has seen me burn and get burned in many competitions and always knew exactly what to say to BRING OUT THE MONSTER in me, invoking an elevated Mindset. Man, did I need that now, Coach! Here is what he told me: “Look, SO WHAT you lost a foul shooting contest. WHO CARES? You know what you can do. You have one more day- just go through the motions. None of this- means NOTHING, Son! DO NOT CARE…I’ll see ya tomorrow. I’ll leave early. I love you.”
MY REACTION:
WOW! WOW! WOW! Where would I be without his LOVE and mentorship? I settled down, took a walk around campus, and pondered his proposal. Being the EXTREMIST that I am, this is what I came up with in my mind: “F%&# it, two tears in a bucket!..I DON’T EVEN CARE if I win A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G at this god-damned camp. Whatever, dude. THIS IS A JOKE. Who the hell cares!”
FRIDAY:
Tomorrow, was a full day of contests. The first one, was the Ball Handling Skill Contest. I was selected among a handful of guards to compete as the whole camp huddled in a circle around us on the floor. Little did I know that my Dad gave me THE SECRET SAUCE (the anomaly impetus) to overcome the PARADOX OF DESIRE! When they instructed us to dribble low between the legs- I complied…for a few seconds! 😊 Then, began SLAMMING the ball between my legs (just 1 dribble), then walking forward and backwards with my eyes closed, afterwards twisting in circles bouncing the ball between my legs…To me, IT WAS A JOKE! I don’t care if they disqualify me for not listening…DO IT! In fact, I want to be disqualified. And I don’t care who is looking or keeping score. I don’t care if I MESS UP (but I didn’t). When they instructed us to spin the ball on our finger, I spun it on all 4 fingers (down the line) then ala Maravich, lowered my hand down by my ankles between my legs and then flipped it up behind my back (Shoulder height) only to catch it on my finger & keep it spinning. I was showing off- FOR ME! I do not need their trophy- I knew what I could do. I utilized this free-style approach on every skill they instructed us. When it was over- there was DEAD SILENCE…then the unexpected happened- The Counselor in Charge said that there was no need to confer with the other judges, that it was OBVIOUS who the winner was! He called my name and the whole camp exploded with applause!
Footnote on winning: DAMN RIGHT! But I STILL didn’t care. It STILL meant nothing to me! It just confirmed my truth- it was all JUST A JOKE! After my soul got BEAT DOWN so bad yesterday- no amount of winning could change things….Give it to someone else- I really didn’t care. I was still pissed from yesterday, “F%&# it, two tears in a god-damn bucket!”
3-POINT CONTEST:
When it came to the Outside Shooting Contest, I would defiantly throw the ball to spin back towards me, take a dribble and LET IT FLY! I didn’t even count how many I made, but the pressure took a toll on all my competitors. I kept advancing and ended up in the FINALS. While my competitor was sizing up every shot, I was free styling- talking trash, JOKING, and lett’n it fly. If I missed- OH WELL, whatever! If there was a pressure moment- I MOCKED IT! In fact, I INVITED IT! If I lose- it really MEANS NOTHING TO ME! When my competitor made a few in a row, I’d compliment him, and encouraged him. I hope he makes em all was my mindset! This contest was all mine for the taking. How could it not be? Win or Lose- I had THE SECRET SAUCE!
THE SECRET SAUCE:
When your training (practice, repetition, & muscle memory) take over- NO MIND!
When the pressure of the moment does NOT affect- & INFECT you.
When you shed the desire to HAVE it- because YOU ARE IT.
When you are NOT restrained by the THOUGHT OF LOSING, missing, or messing up.
When you realize that caring cannot fulfill craving- & YOU’RE FREE!
AT THE END OF THE DAY:
I won the Ball Handling contest, the 3-Point Contest, made 1st String All-Star, and my Team (3 on 3) took 2nd place…WHAT A JOKE! My Dad witnessed a few of my games and knew by our 1st eye-contact, that I WAS MYSELF, again. Just another example as to how my father- Leveled the Playing Field! His philosophy on life gave me such an EDGE. Thanks Dad! Ye Tebe Luben, lippi dobre Otetz.
P.S. When you have to LET GO OF THE WANT- to BE FREE! This understanding (the Secret Sauce) can apply to any enterprise & ANY ENDEAVOR…From the Lookout Post.